Ep. 15: Rock Bottom To Award Winner with George Bannister

 

Unedited Interview with George Bannister

00:00.00
katrinamcollier
George Bannister welcome to Beyond The Damage of Words podcast. You are the fastest guest I’ve had book I’m so thrilled I mean we just met on the weekend and he were booked just.

00:09.12
George Bannister
Well if I was gone the theory if you’re not fast. You’re last so I don’t want to be last therefore I’m fast.

00:16.95
katrinamcollier
Absolutely absolutely. Actually it was really cool because you were one of what actually know I should say technically we met because I was just about to pull post-it notes off your butt that somehow stopped myself. Um, but because we met at the hay house UK writers workshop and you were like 1 of what a hat.

00:30.60
George Bannister
I think there was I was one of 5 or 6 token boys out of about 300 people I think so yeah.

00:31.64
katrinamcollier
Handful of boys in the room which is just crazy isn’t it.

00:37.70
katrinamcollier
Yeah, which is crazy just shows how many more men need to do this work anyway as I always do with this podcast I just get straight on with it. What led you into healing. Why did you start working on yourself. What happened? okay.

00:43.96
George Bannister
Yep.

00:52.44
George Bannister
The reason I went into healing. It wasn’t a it certainly wasn’t a conscious decision. It wasn’t I woke up one day and went oh I know what I’m to do I’m gonna heal myself. Yeah, that’ll be my my task for the day. Um I was yeah I was.

01:04.71
katrinamcollier
Oh this sounds familiar.

01:09.73
George Bannister
I gonna say I was lead there but I wasn’t even led there I I was dragged there I think through I suppose the thing that started me off was ah my background is heavily addiction based um ferald amount of trauma mixed in along the way. Um I’ve.

01:23.89
katrinamcollier
Ah.

01:29.20
George Bannister
I believe that I had undiagnosed ptsd growing up as a child only kind of realized learnt that at the age of about 37 when I started went oh hang on a minute here I had that I had that rings a bell um went very heavily into the path of addiction.

01:43.35
katrinamcollier
Um, ah.

01:48.96
George Bannister
Starting off at on a 13 with kind of cannabis and onto ecstasy the rave scene heroin crack cocaine prison all the trauma and stuff that comes with it and I suppose yeah why I didn’t even see it as numbing.

01:53.92
katrinamcollier
And.

01:59.63
katrinamcollier
So that the numb the numbing got a little out of control and took I.

02:08.89
George Bannister
See I was just having a good time but that was ah ah that was at a conscious level a subconscious level. It was it was kind of numbing not being able to deal with life. Um, all those all those things that we do. So I came into healing.

02:09.83
katrinamcollier
Oh I yeah.

02:20.64
katrinamcollier
And.

02:28.50
George Bannister
I suppose I came in kicking and screaming really? um, ah think the main one would have been when I went into rehab in 2010 and that was just because I I literally just couldn’t handle life on life’s terms. There’s I’d hit so many rock bottoms that you think.

02:30.79
katrinamcollier
2 Yeah.

02:37.93
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

02:44.97
katrinamcollier
Yep.

02:47.85
George Bannister
Ah, so right I can’t go any lower and then lo and behold. You’re like oh no I can go lower. Um, so yeah I I of yeah.

02:55.20
katrinamcollier
Yeah, you’re most hunting fate saying that aren’t you like Hello Universe I can’t go any lower. Yeah, let’s show you you can? Yeah, you can see that now. Ah you now you’re out the other end you can see that at the time it’s like horrific. But yeah, amazing. So.

03:00.56
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, no now we’ll we’ll show you? Yeah yeah hot hindsights.

03:12.82
katrinamcollier
Was that a tough like detox as well was it like straight in cruel or was it because I read one of your Linkedin at your Instagram posts which looked at hardcore horrible with the detox was that that one. Yeah.

03:16.65
George Bannister
Um, the.

03:23.82
George Bannister
Yeah, that that would have been Um, no when I went to Rehab that was fairly soft and easy because I was essentially then I was addicted to alcohol and Ketmin mainly bit of cocaine. So it’s more of a psychological detox that one.

03:31.54
katrinamcollier
I’ll thank vaness. Yeah.

03:35.51
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yep.

03:40.98
George Bannister
Um, which once I was in a safe environment. You know that was fine. The 1 you read would have been that had been from the 14th January 2005 and that was the day that I got um taken into x to prison and I was in for.

03:54.55
katrinamcollier
Um, and.

03:57.50
katrinamcollier
Right.

03:59.70
George Bannister
Attempted arm robbery on a post office and I was doing I don’t know I was doing a lot of injecting heroin and crack cocaine every day and at the time when you went in. Yeah well when when you went in it. It varies different times.

04:10.19
katrinamcollier
And that was cold tacking.

04:18.73
George Bannister
You know over the years when I went in at that stage in 2005 in exta they they were saying because we you know we’d all go in and would be like I can’t go I’ve give us you know gives a bit of mephthadone or some subberext or you know something to take the edge off. They’re like no if you add a prescription from your.

04:32.40
katrinamcollier
Yeah.

04:37.51
George Bannister
Gp on the outside you’re allowed to continue that but I didn’t so it was that that one was brutal um with hindsight looking back I’m grateful for that at the time definitely was not grateful far far from grateful but I didn’t.

04:49.81
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah.

04:54.67
katrinamcollier
Do you think because it was so hard it kind of stopped you going into the depths of addiction again to that point where you’d have to go through that horrific a detox or am I getting it wrong.

04:56.44
George Bannister
Ah, fear is.

05:06.24
George Bannister
Um, I’d say it played a part I’d I wouldn’t say just that was enough because I’ve been through that a number of times is a if you’re a semi functioning heroin addict. That’s that’s part This is just part of life. Do you know? I mean is.

05:09.27
katrinamcollier
Man.

05:17.83
katrinamcollier
Fish stock home. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.

05:24.15
George Bannister
That’s your reality is being Ill and but yeah is is horrendous kind of pain. Um.

05:29.93
katrinamcollier
I’ve I’ve always been extremely grateful that when I started smoking I literally had a cigarette and that was it like I was so addicted so fast I’ve always thought don’t ever clutch hard drugs. Thank goodness because I do know I’d have been gone so I can see how it happens.

05:35.94
George Bannister
Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, is some.

05:45.38
katrinamcollier
Particularly you know I’ve had the complex features too so it would have been very easy to go that path. So yeah, so then you went into this is when you stopp drinking then was the next the one you added to talk to.

05:56.45
George Bannister
Um, yeah, so when when what went into Rehab that was the the difficult one for me psychologically was alcohol because alcohol’s socially acceptable so things like I know. Yeah.

06:04.49
katrinamcollier
Yeah, it’s everywhere’s easy to get like it’s isn’t it. It’s just that it it’s in the supermarket. It’s like in this it’s in it’s everywhere. It’s yeah.

06:12.37
George Bannister
And was is.

06:18.29
George Bannister
Was is social lubricant. Do you know what? I mean like people is things are changing a little bit and the younger generation are slightly different I’m finding um, but certainly when I stopped in 2010 it was people.

06:22.27
katrinamcollier
5

06:30.00
katrinamcollier
Um, the oldies aren.

06:34.96
George Bannister
Would be like what what you mean? you don’t drink like they I’ve had people I’ve said someone said to me, do you want a beer I said no thanks. They said you want a volca as the no no I’m good I don’t drink and I’ve had people literally physically move back and go oh like you’ve got some infectious disease. Um, so that.

06:38.53
katrinamcollier
Ah.

06:49.35
katrinamcollier
I yeah, it is crazy isn’t it I I stopped in 2020 just because I think it was part of the ascension that’s going on around the world really but and I have a neighbor who’s kept asking me in for a drink and I’m like yeah no I’m fine and’m fine because I know.

06:55.13
George Bannister
Mentally yep.

07:08.25
katrinamcollier
Reaction will be like that if I go I don’t drink and I just can’t I Just don’t want to deal with it. So I’m just like oh yes, Sir I’m busy I alcohol with something up. Yeah, it’s awful. That’s awful that I’m glad that at least for the youngsters that’s changing that attitude.

07:10.73
George Bannister
Yep, No yeah, yeah, there is yeah there is change coming through I Meet. Quite a lot of people under thirtyti who don’t drink just for you know I don’t really enjoy it. It doesn’t make me feel great. Um I’m focusing on my fitness that sort of thing. But for me that was my whole that was my whole lifestyle like way of being I was a super sociable person who was out all the time you can.

07:33.30
katrinamcollier
Yeah.

07:44.61
katrinamcollier
Ah.

07:44.69
George Bannister
When you’re in the depths of addiction if you’re ah if you’re a heroin or crack addict. You can imagine a life without it. It’s extremely hard to get out of it but you can amount you can. You can visualize a reality where you’re not injecting heroin every day.

07:53.30
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah, interesting. Yeah.

08:01.41
George Bannister
If you’re a functioning or semifunctioning alcoholic. The the thing that people go to straightway is um, a classic one that I used to hear would be someone would be like what what am I gonna do at Christmas you know how am I Goingnna celebrate on my birthday. What am I going to do at my daughter’s wedding when I go to give her away. And it’s like oh have you got a daughter trav you no I haven’t got a daughter but if I did you know I mean that’s that’s the the stories that people tell themselves.

08:24.80
katrinamcollier
Yeah, it’s it’s yeah I hear what you’re saying. It’s funny isn’t it because I was just thinking about me dancing around the kitchen right? as you were saying that it’s like I don’t need alcohol to do that now but I kind of get the thinking but at the same time I don’t get the thinking because you don’t need it to have a good time.

08:36.65
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, no yeah.

08:43.26
katrinamcollier
It’s big. It’s like ah but the alcohol makes me have a good time. It’s like no, you have a good time. So so what happened at that point though when you say like you went kicking and screaming into did someone hold a mirror up to you or what? what happened to start the journey to realizing what was going on.

08:55.23
George Bannister
Um I I think when I do I’ve done quite a few talks at like schools and things like that and I always use the term I was quite fortunate because I had the gift of desperation.

09:10.66
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah, oh.

09:12.40
George Bannister
So I had nowhere I had nowhere else to turn. Do not mean you when you get to a certain stage. You have your free options. They are jails I go back to prison Nice option. Believe it or not because you you’re safe in there. You get fed you You have a routine you get a decent gym. Do not mean life’s easy.

09:21.56
katrinamcollier
And okay.

09:30.15
katrinamcollier
Okay, I’ve watched too much bad television clearly I didn’t think jails were safe. Okay, interesting right? Okay, different point of view to my Tv watching. Yeah yeah, no I know what you’re saying what’s the second option.

09:31.50
George Bannister
Um, you got institutions. Yeah it it depends it depends on your perspective. Yeah you um I was I was going to say go and try it but don’t do that.

09:48.49
George Bannister
Ah, institutions.

09:48.64
katrinamcollier
No no and I’m being a bit flippant but ah strangely I thought that would be terribly unsafe place. So yeah, say institutions and what’s.

09:55.80
George Bannister
Ah, pen yeah institutions which would be rehab centers which where I went or mental asylums which I would have been an absolutely banging candidate for at various points in time so you got jails institution the third month death kill yourself when you’re in that space.

10:03.98
katrinamcollier
Um.

10:09.90
katrinamcollier
Right? Okay, yeah.

10:12.75
George Bannister
That can seem a very um, decent option. But the thing you don’t realize in that moment is that Suicide is a permanent problem a permanent solution to a temporary problem and I’ve unfortunately lost.

10:29.88
katrinamcollier
Ah.

10:31.19
George Bannister
A lot of friends over the years um I’ve been there myself and had multiple failed to aside attempts and in that in that moment that seems like the perfect solution if I do this all that will go away. Everyone else will be happy.

10:46.49
katrinamcollier
Um.

10:49.42
George Bannister
Ah, be doing everyone a favor and it’s only with hindsight that you manage to get out of the darkness and start living in the light a bit that you can look back and reflect and go Ashley I’m bloody glad that didn’t happen and.

10:52.46
katrinamcollier
Certain that.

11:04.62
katrinamcollier
Yeah, well I’m I’m glady glad as well. Well I grew up in the I what I call the ripple of a suicide. So my mother’s first husband suicided I mean she was already an narcissist but that just tipped her over the edge and then she married my dad who never really loved her and on it goes so it’s like I on behalf of.

11:07.50
George Bannister
You know if you’ve ever been. Yeah. Right? Yeah yeah.

11:24.38
katrinamcollier
Everybody that wasn’t in your ripple because that didn’t happen. Thank you for it not happening. Um, it’s it’s an every time I see that you know somebody’s suicide of my oh that poor family because a ripple just goes on it goes down generations. It’s quite extraordinary. So you you then? so you went to Rehab. So.

11:27.60
George Bannister
Um, yeah, thank you.

11:35.47
George Bannister
Yeah, yep, yeah.

11:44.90
katrinamcollier
Do do they have what do they have in their counselors coaches like is there a process. How do they get you to look at your life and realize that you can change it tough questions are going on today. But after the weekend I know you can cope. Ah.

11:48.34
George Bannister
It it very it. Um I went there and no, no, no yeah I Love a tough question. Um from at me give it to me.

12:04.35
katrinamcollier
Ah, okay here we go. Ah.

12:05.54
George Bannister
Um, so so it depends very much on rehabs are all different. The one I went to I don’t think I haven’t got much to base it against but from conversations I’ve had with different people I don’t think it’s particularly good one. It shut down shortly after I went there I think out of.

12:14.34
katrinamcollier
Anna.

12:23.11
katrinamcollier
Oh run.

12:25.20
George Bannister
Rates are never great for rehabs out of like 20 of us there I think maybe 2 of us stay clean, but that’s fairly common for rehabs to be honest, they they say your chances of success are about 5% 1 in 20 I think that’s a bit conservative I think it’s probably not even that high. Um.

12:31.84
katrinamcollier
Wow.

12:39.81
katrinamcollier
I wow.

12:44.76
George Bannister
So they have a process I went through a 12 step rehab I’m not here to promote any particular thing for me that worked well. Um, yeah, no um I suppose going through the process with a 12 step program.

12:47.42
katrinamcollier
But. No I Just want to know what worked for you. That’s yeah, don’t don’t feel like you need to compare just what work for you.

13:03.47
katrinamcollier
And then.

13:04.32
George Bannister
They get you to look at ah basically what’s been done wrong to you What you’ve done wrong admitting to your mistakes and it’s basically it’s basically a code for living that I still live by now like if I make a if I make a mistake I promptly admit it.

13:13.98
katrinamcollier
Um.

13:16.65
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah.

13:21.36
katrinamcollier
So yeah.

13:23.93
George Bannister
Once I’ve realized and made them mistake. Sometimes it takes minutes sometimes weeks sometimes years but it’s yeah yeah, there’s probably still a couple sitting out there somewhere? Um, but it’s just basically being a decent human being you know like making amends I think making amends is quite a big one.

13:28.13
katrinamcollier
Such as might take a few years yeah

13:37.70
katrinamcollier
Written.

13:43.69
George Bannister
Because most people who’ve been down that path have done some pretty crappy stuff and there’s certain amends that I can’t make so there’s there’s things like financialends if you stole something from a shop you can go into the shop say look a nick this here’s a 5 or whatever that’s quite an easy one to.

13:48.22
katrinamcollier
Ah.

13:51.93
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

13:57.72
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

14:03.10
George Bannister
Sort out. But for example with my mom. The amount of stress and angst and all the rest of the crap that I caused over the years there’s no way I can undo that I can say sorry till I’m blue in the face but you can’t you can’t undo it.

14:05.54
katrinamcollier
Button.

14:14.80
katrinamcollier
M.

14:22.60
George Bannister
So with things like that I have to make.

14:22.71
katrinamcollier
What about but surely she must look at you now though and the fact that you’ve stayed clean that you’ve turned your life around that you’ve you know you’re making a success of it. You’re inspiring other people to heal surely. That’s actually what she loves and.

14:37.86
George Bannister
With us’ what? yeah well, that’s what it’s coming on to so you have direct amends which is giving someone the money. But um, yeah, it indirect amends is yeah is where you can’t You can’t undo the damage.

14:42.50
katrinamcollier
Oh sorry. Ah I’ve just jumped ahead. Yeah I kind of behavioral amends. Yeah.

14:54.72
George Bannister
So therefore you indirectly make amends and basically I sum up by not being a twa. Basically you do not mean if I act in a decent way. Don’t act like an idiot then by doing that I am making amends going forward.

15:03.48
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah.

15:10.30
katrinamcollier
Yeah I like that.

15:12.79
George Bannister
So I think I think that and once you start I became quite a I don’t know what’s word um, had a certain amount of acknowledgement of Karma You know what? what I’ve seen it in business I’ve seen it in relationships I’ve seen it in financially.

15:25.50
katrinamcollier
3

15:32.45
George Bannister
And you put out good things and your life will go like that because that’s how life goes. But if you keep doing the right thing walk on the right side of the street then life can become quite good. Yeah.

15:42.88
katrinamcollier
Life. It turns around was there a so like a source of the pain that you had to find and acknowledge to therefore be able to stop the addiction or is it still with you like how does it because I mean you mentioned obviously there was a. Was it a 1 incident ptsd that you were able to deal with or was it something like mine where it was like that repetitive trauma because ah, you probably don’t know my story but.

16:07.32
George Bannister
So when when ah, um when I was 4 years old there was ah extremely violent armed robbery at my house I wasn’t directly.

16:19.46
katrinamcollier
Oh Wow Okay, um.

16:20.99
George Bannister
Hurt or anything but like my dad was beaten up with a baseball bat knife to my mom robbed the place like really pretty savage so I witnessed all of that but it was the 1980 s do you know? I mean it wasn’t it wasn’t like oh you know he’s got adh d oh he’s got this. He’s got. There’s.

16:35.99
katrinamcollier
Um.

16:38.55
katrinamcollier
Yeah.

16:39.60
George Bannister
There wasn’t that pigeonholing it was like well the kid seems fine So that’s all right on we go and it’s only like say it’s one. Yeah yep.

16:44.22
katrinamcollier
At that incredibly critical age as well. It’s really that age where you feel responsible for everything as a 4 our-year-old like my trauma was at 3 it. Well 1 specific incident and it’s like I felt responsible for it. You would have felt even though you weren’t you.

16:58.89
George Bannister
Um, yeah.

17:00.94
katrinamcollier
Would have been like oh mom and dad are upset or they’re hiding or they’ healing or they hurt and it’s like it’s all my fault and I we internalize it. That’s huge. Oh my goodness and and it was the 80 s we didn’t have help oh I was the 70 s but we didn’t have help. We didn’t have help’ like man.

17:05.77
George Bannister
Yeah, the um, my.

17:14.32
George Bannister
No, no, it was um what I cause like say it was only when I heard a talk ah I did a workshop for smaritans in 2019 and I heard this army chaplain talking about ptsd you know he’s out in Afghan like picking up the.

17:24.80
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

17:32.23
George Bannister
Mental pieces from the soldiers coming back in a horrendous job and he started describing ptsd and I was just like hang on a minute that he’s described my childhood and 1 of the interesting things that I knew all the way through my childhood I’ve got a very clear vivid.

17:33.49
katrinamcollier
Um, ah.

17:40.66
katrinamcollier
And.

17:49.51
katrinamcollier
Ah, yes.

17:51.90
George Bannister
Recollection of that night my recollection of events is completely different to what happened so I’ve just started writing my book and I open up the opening chapter as the robbery. So my mom’s gone through with me in detail like exactly what happens step by step.

18:08.46
katrinamcollier
M.

18:10.41
George Bannister
And I’ve got what actually happened and my version of events and they are worlds apart. So I recreated the whole event and I kind of I believe that till.

18:19.86
katrinamcollier
Ah, but so will she have so try and get this out one go she will have as well. So it’s quite interesting because I’ve been doing a thing about like getting the stories because I detached from my trauma through memory loss. So I’ve had to like call in my sister and stuff like that like help me here.

18:25.30
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah.

18:33.52
George Bannister
Yep, yeah.

18:36.12
katrinamcollier
But it’s how we remember stuff and we do all remember it differently depending on what experiences we’d had at that time. Um, and then we change it every time we remember it. We change it. So it’s like she’ll have changed it as well. So don’t be too hard on yourself if they’re completely different. Um.

18:44.11
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

18:53.83
katrinamcollier
I’m not surprised you were full but it’s still interesting as she goes like really stands firm and you’re like but I really felt this I Really remember this because you may be right.

19:02.29
George Bannister
Love to me it was it was fine. There was a to me there was a four year old boy stood next to me in my room who I didn’t know but I felt quite safe with and he said um, he said we’re gonna play a game and you got a walk across the other side of the room but watch out for little bits plastic.

19:10.17
katrinamcollier
M.

19:17.80
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

19:18.20
George Bannister
And it’s it’s a game and it’s eras and I felt quite safe quite secure. Of course it wasn’t plastic. It was glass from a window that just been smashed in so there’s glass all over the floor yet. This little boy was telling me that little boy doesn’t exist like nobody else is.

19:27.56
katrinamcollier
Ah, yeah.

19:35.83
George Bannister
Ever seen or heard of this little boy but I can remember with absolute vivid accuracy how I felt and you know everything was fine and and I just had free guys Smash from a bedroom window and jump jump on the bed. Um, so yeah, interesting.

19:38.96
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah.

19:48.41
katrinamcollier
Um, interesting I’m thinking about what we were talking about before you came on though with some of our our clear skills that we have I wonder if at 4 you were open and something helped you whether it had was a past soul or an angel or something I wonder.

20:00.86
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, hundred percent hundred percent yeah I I can vaguely I can’t remember any incident in.

20:08.21
katrinamcollier
If that’s what actually happens So that’s why you’re recollecting it like that because it will it gets shut down usually after that. Yeah interesting. Wow.

20:20.81
George Bannister
Incidents like that. But I can remember I remember um it yeah.

20:23.16
katrinamcollier
We’re both struggling to speak today I’m not surprised that weekend was full on intense information was it ah’s like and it’s only where are we Wednesday I’m still processing so sorry I interrupted yet again big shock.

20:35.14
George Bannister
Um, no worries. Ah I can I remember my cousins at a very young age all taking the mick out of me because I had like imaginary friends. So and there’s a lot of children have imaginary friends.

20:44.57
katrinamcollier
Um, yeah.

20:50.50
katrinamcollier
Oh.

20:51.85
George Bannister
And um I think a lot of that is that openness and they’re still connected to something else. That’s not necessarily in the visual reality dimension wherever that we’re in. They’re still connected into something else. So that’s that’s my thoughts.

20:55.87
katrinamcollier
Yeah.

21:03.58
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah, unseen yeah absolutely yeah so I’ve written about um past lives because I’ve had four past life aggressions.

21:11.84
George Bannister
Um, what happened there.

21:17.88
katrinamcollier
And there’s evidence I’ve interviewed like 3000 children under a certain age and they can all perfectly recall their last past life and it’s like there’s evidence like what more do we need? So yeah, so what’s your how’s your memoir. What? what’s your plan with it. What are you because you said you started writing is that helping you heal as well.

21:18.41
George Bannister
Yep. Yeah, yep, yeah.

21:35.40
George Bannister
Yeah, so in the I’ve been told since sit since probably my mid 20 s random people from all different walks of life have come up to me and said you need to write a book and I’ve been like I yeah yeah I’m not I’m not a writer. Do you not mean I don’t enjoy writing why would I write a book.

21:37.63
katrinamcollier
Because it’s really therapeutic I tell you? yeah.

21:54.26
katrinamcollier
Ah.

21:54.43
George Bannister
And then after the I know one hundred and fiftieth person I was like you know what? I’ll I’ll just write a book. Um, in the first instance yeah in in the first instance I’m writing it for myself. The kiphatic exercise of just there’s been I believe.

22:01.47
katrinamcollier
Um, ah I’ll write one page and see what happens.

22:07.90
katrinamcollier
And.

22:14.10
George Bannister
Looking back with hindsight that I’ve actively sought out trauma my whole life. Do you not mean i’ I’m not consciously but subconsciously addiction prison crime um cage fighting jumping out of airplanes surf it just if it’s dangerous I’m like oh.

22:17.86
katrinamcollier
Button. Yeah.

22:31.77
katrinamcollier
Wow When truth are somehow related to the fact that you just didn’t have fear or I wonder if that somehow helps numb the fear i’ mean thinking of the crazy stuff you’ve done of late jumping out of planes E etc.

22:33.79
George Bannister
Start? Um, so.

22:46.59
George Bannister
Is is something about the adrenaline but I like I grew up flooded with anxiety I’m not someone who’s like lot lot the guys I trained with they’re like they’re hard people.

22:48.24
katrinamcollier
Um, wondering if that helps numb that adrenaline Rush helps numb some of that trauma must still I went out interesting. Yeah.

22:57.50
katrinamcollier
Yeah, of course. Yeah.

23:04.27
George Bannister
Not mean they’ve grown up fighting their whole life. They’re fairly fearless some of them. They’re just hard I’m not hard I’m soft Naturally I’m a very soft person. So I forced myself into those situations. Um, just to I think overcome.

23:12.31
katrinamcollier
I noticed.

23:18.75
katrinamcollier
Ah, right? so.

23:23.59
George Bannister
Fear but there’s also something about the adrenaline. It’s probably within the addiction pattern addicted to.

23:25.59
katrinamcollier
Yeah, interesting. Are you doing something actively for your ptsd because I promise you you can heal it if you have not they say that you can’t but you can like I know people who have.

23:37.80
George Bannister
Yeah I haven’t done anything I’ve done various things like um ah I’ve done bits of Nlp hypnosis um regression stuff. But yeah day to day I don’t feel that I think.

23:46.75
katrinamcollier
Button.

23:55.29
George Bannister
Where it affected me most was probably up to the age of about 16 Um I just burst into floods of tears at the slightest little thing. Um, so yeah, just kind of like says it’s never been diagnosed or anything like that. It’s just what I’ve pieced pieced together.

23:58.78
katrinamcollier
Patent.

24:13.91
George Bannister
Over the years okay

24:14.37
katrinamcollier
Yeah, try um in a child work because that can be really really amazing because you can then tap back into that 4 year old and give him all of that love and support that you.

24:23.46
George Bannister
Yep.

24:26.40
katrinamcollier
Needed at that moment that you didn’t necessarily get because your parents were dealing with everything they were going through and it was the ius so we just stiff up a lipped. Everything didn’t we um it was the same in Australia like it. It’s very similar in that. Let’s not talk about now. Everyone’s talking about it. Um.

24:33.77
George Bannister
Yep, get on with it her it? yeah.

24:42.40
katrinamcollier
So that could be really amazing because that’s really really helped me was the inner child work. Um, so the way michelle Zelly and I write about this explains it. You know we’ve got a functional adult who’s talking now the inner teenager who you’ve met quite a few times in your life and then the inner child so when the inner child feels scared. If the functional adult doesn’t step in and provide support outcomes that in a teenager and and then that’s the one you don’t really want to come out because that’s the one that’s likely to do the addiction and the door slamming and the fighting and the adrenaline and the whereas actually sometimes it’s like and it’s so easy I mean there’s meditation I mean obviously.

25:04.52
George Bannister
Ah.

25:12.66
George Bannister
Yep.

25:18.43
katrinamcollier
The best route is through a therapist to really understand what you’re doing or a coach but there are Meditations I mean I just sometimes sit and like self-soothe or I just talk to her and say I’ve got you because I can feel now and she’s like squirming sometimes doing somersaults if I’m about to go and do something that’s a bit you know unusual. She’s like but.

25:21.80
George Bannister
Yep.

25:27.95
George Bannister
Um, yep, just.

25:37.71
katrinamcollier
Mean it? What’s going on. That’s okay I’ve got you Ma gotcha. It’s all good. You don’t have these kind of conversations. It could help I just I I don’t understand why there’s not more in a child work out there because everyone I know who’s who’s had that process that oh that’s so good. So could be worth exploring.

25:40.32
George Bannister
Yep.

25:45.95
George Bannister
Um, yeah.

25:53.81
katrinamcollier
What’s next in your great empire that you’re building I mean talk about turning around to your life. So you you now Coach is that right? you’ve got a property business I mean that? yeah.

25:53.87
George Bannister
Yep.

25:59.26
George Bannister
Yeah, so my background is property development and I’ve always done not not mass scale. But I do very bespoke high end period properties I’ve created 2

26:06.82
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

26:14.42
katrinamcollier
How lovely.

26:17.57
George Bannister
High end holiday lets that pull in a very nice passive income that allow me to go off to barley through the winter which I’ll be doing next month ah yep um I do business coaching honestly, it’s rough. Yeah, you’re sweating all day is.

26:25.14
katrinamcollier
And write books. Oh Barley must be so tough I don’t know how you cope with Barley place Sorry about all the Australians in cuna though. Ah.

26:37.11
George Bannister
Well, you know the we got put them somewhere. Ah ah, ah, ah, try to avoid Kuta not for that reason. But um, so yeah I’ve had a lot of success in a variety of different industries So holiday lets manufacturing.

26:41.30
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah God So would I.

26:52.10
katrinamcollier
Amazing.

26:56.51
George Bannister
Construction. So I do business coaching helping I got quite a quite a specific type of client. They need to be extremely driven and just you know, get on with stuff as I’m not dragging anyone with me. Um, but yeah, that’s that’s really interesting because I just love business.

27:05.84
katrinamcollier
And.

27:15.69
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah.

27:16.29
George Bannister
Love how businesses work I’m also writing a book which I learned at the weekend is a teaching memoir I’d never heard of that term. Yeah no I was like oh I Ah um, a.

27:24.86
katrinamcollier
Teaching memoir I’d never heard of it either? Well my second you at 1 point they put up the piacus logo and Judy Piakus is actually my second cousin who I found not that long ago and she said at one point oh this sounds a bit like a misery memoir and I went. Ah.

27:34.20
George Bannister
Okay, yep.

27:41.98
katrinamcollier
No, no, no like but like here teaching Memoir was like yeah this is amazing. But you know she hasn’t been in the publishing game for a little while. So potentially that it’s a new I feel I feel like they’re quite new these teaching memoirs so that’s quite I found the word count thing really strange though.

27:44.59
George Bannister
Ah, yeah, yes.

27:56.30
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah notes. Um.

28:01.40
katrinamcollier
Because you know they were going on about how few words and mine is 80000 I’m having to cut it down and then I’m looking at like this one and and this must be 90000 and I will happily sit and read this. This is about complex ptsd so I’m like why does it have to be so sure anyway, very odd.

28:04.73
George Bannister
Okay.

28:11.85
George Bannister
Okay.

28:18.85
George Bannister
Yeah.

28:20.99
katrinamcollier
That’ll be the hardest bit is just making something that’s 70000 words they even said 50 to 60000 at one point you’ll you’re at the beginning you’re probably like I’m going to get to 10000 it’ll be a miracle. Okay.

28:23.97
George Bannister
yeah yeah I feel I think it’s 40 to 60 Yeah, saying like that I say that I wrote I wrote the first oh I’ve done the first 3 chapters I thought is a first chapter but then.

28:33.60
katrinamcollier
You wait till you start rotting.

28:40.60
katrinamcollier
Right.

28:41.98
George Bannister
Ah, realized it’s about 10000 words or something that I honor there’s actually 3 different chapters here. So I can see how it is yeah I think you just got to get it. You just got to get it all out. Start off with and then get that first draft done and then start fine tuning and it’ll be for me. It’ll be.

28:53.10
katrinamcollier
Yeah, um.

28:59.57
George Bannister
Write everything out all the stories and then work out which ones are relevant and which ones you pull the teaching out of and which ones will ultimately help other people.

29:01.19
katrinamcollier
Yeah, yeah, that’s the bit I’m going to go back and just check I think I think think I lost my core message on the way through I think.

29:15.86
George Bannister
Yep.

29:15.87
katrinamcollier
Overshaed So that that was good because I did go up to one of the commissioner editorishs and check. So for anyone listening who’s ready to purchase it. It’ll be better and slightly sure on it I still feel like it’s a ripple if you pay all this money in the book shorter I’m like that’s how I look at it weird like like it needs to be fatter and have more stories on it. But I know it’s exciting.

29:23.20
George Bannister
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

29:35.91
katrinamcollier
I Did enjoy it and I think that um just how many people in the room were writing but one of the big things I took away was like right from the Scar not the wound and I thought that was amazing. You know when some people got up to speak and they were still crying I was like Wow I’m glad I’m writing from the Scar like that was.

29:44.32
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah.

29:52.38
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, it is um it was yeah our thought is really like for me I know a lot of the people there were readers writers. Do not mean that’s that’s what they’re about so from my perspective.

29:53.69
katrinamcollier
Quite emotional wasn’t it to to watch.

30:07.70
katrinamcollier
Um.

30:08.49
George Bannister
I don’t come from that background I’m not a writer. Do you know? I mean I I don’t other than Instagram posts I don’t write anything. So for me, it was I just found it a really good easy to understand really well put together weekend is um, yeah.

30:15.72
katrinamcollier
Um, oh yeah.

30:23.70
katrinamcollier
Yeah, no, it was good. Wasn’t it. So actually I think you said healers I Thought you think yeah they were went there. There were all healers in the room. But then there were a lot of people with really interesting backgrounds who weren’t and that I didn’t expect to be in that specific room yourself included.

30:28.35
George Bannister
Just what I needed really.

30:36.36
George Bannister
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

30:43.12
katrinamcollier
Because it was. It’s very spiritual isn’t it so but it was exciting So well I can’t wait to see it. That’s for sure. Um, if anybody wants to get in touch with you book you to speak about this or you know just look at your coaching. Whatever where’s the best place to find you.

30:54.93
George Bannister
The easiest place to the moment is probably Instagram and that’s George Bannister Bannister Underscore Com the other option is my website which hopefully by the time this is out will be ready but it still work in progress at the moment and that is George Bannisterbanister dot com. So that’s. All about. Um, yeah, yeah, it’s been a working. It’s it’s been a work in progress for I think it since August something like that says about three months but the problem is.

31:14.19
katrinamcollier
Yeah I saw that was a work in progress. It made me chuckle. Ah, they’re not easy. They’re not easy. Ah.

31:25.85
katrinamcollier
Oh this sounds so bad. Yeah.

31:29.39
George Bannister
I Keep I keep evolving faster than my website copy evolves. So um I’ll kind of get into a new area and I’ll be like no that needs rewriting and kind of but it’s it’s good. It’s that transformation process which which I love yeah.

31:41.44
katrinamcollier
That’s when you call in an expert like it’s yeah if it’s if you’re really struggling with it call an experting. That’s the best. Yeah.

31:46.40
George Bannister
Ah I always I always work with coaches on everything I I do so thus that’s with experts on the case as well. Yeah, yeah, yes, well hope hope Thank you very much for inviting me.

31:51.79
katrinamcollier
Oh well at some point next year we might split anyway. Thank you so much. Oh this sorry I miss that alo I mean just amazing and.

32:04.70
George Bannister
Ah, just saying Thank you for inviting me on.

32:07.77
katrinamcollier
Beautiful open conversation which is just so lovely. We need more of that particularly from you boys we need more of that open conversation. So thank you so much.

32:13.19
George Bannister
Yep.